Chocolate With Nuts EQG Version A Spongebob Parody

My fanfiction with Spongebob and Cartoon Crossovers

[the scene starts with Ami Onuki and Pinkie Pie standing in front of the outside of the Swamp Pad]

Ami Onuki: See anything yet, Pinkie?

Pinkie Pie: I need my glasses.

[Pinkie Pie puts two glasses of water on her eyes like binoculars, which are real human eyes.]

Pinkie Pie: Hmmm... [a mail truck approaches] ...it's the mail truck!

Ami Onuki and Pinkie Pie: Our package! [Pinkie Pie throws the glasses and they both start dancing and hopping]

[Buhdeuce notice this and watch from the Swamp Pad's front door]

Buhdeuce: I didn't realize it was Happy Hopping Girl Day. [the truck comes to Ami and Pinkie Pie]

Postman Zorch: Ami Onuki?

Ami Onuki: That's me! [Postman Zorch throws a big box next to Ami and Pinkie Pie]

Buhdeuce: Whoa. That's a very big box!

Ami Onuki: Thank you! [the truck leaves]

[Ami and Pinkie Pie are still dancing and hopping]

Pinkie Pie: Hey, Ami, when do we stop hopping?

Ami Onuki: Thirty more seconds, Pinkie. [rubs her hands together]

Buhdeuce: They probably ordered a lifetime supply of bubble soap.

[Buhdeuce laughs as Ami and Pinkie Pie lift up a big-screen TV out of the box]

Buhdeuce: HUH?! A BRAND NEW TELEVISION?!

Ami Onuki: Easy... easy... [both her and Pinkie Pie throw the TV onto a trash-can]

Ami Onuki and Pinkie Pie: Yeah! [jump into the box and close the flaps]

Buhdeuce: Just when I thought they couldn't get any stupider.

[Buhdeuce walks up to the box with Ami and Pinkie Pie inside]

Buhdeuce: So, Let me get this straight, you two ordered a giant screen television just so you girls could play in the box?

Ami Onuki: [as she emerges from the box] Pretty smart, huh?

Pinkie Pie: [emerges from the box] I thought it wouldn't work.

Buhdeuce: Yep! Yep! that's quite a plan there. Oh, but wait, there was something else I wanted to ask you two. Now what was it? Oh, yeah, yeah. [yells in Ami and Pinkie Pie's faces] DON'T YOU TWO HAVE ANY BRAINS?!?!?!?!

Ami Onuki: Buhdeuce, we don't need a television. Not as long as we have our... [makes a rainbow over her head with her hands] ...imagination!

Buhdeuce: Wow, I never thought of it that way. That's really something. Can I have your TV?

Ami Onuki: With... [Ami jumps on the flap of the box, makes another rainbow with her hands] ...imagination, I can be anything I want! A pirate! [curls her finger in a hook shape] Arrrrr! A football player! [stands in a football player stance] Hup!

Pinkie Pie: A Pink Pony!

Buhdeuce: Pinkie, you're already a Pink Pony.

Pinkie Pie: See, Buhdeuce? It works! You try!

Buhdeuce: [rubs his two hand on both sides of his head] Okay, let's see. I'm imaging myself watching TV... [points to the one on the trash-can] ...and there it is! Can I have it, Ami?

Ami Onuki: Sure, Buhdeuce.

Buhdeuce: Yeah, boy! [Buhdeuce runs to the TV] This is going to be so exciting! [pushes the TV to the Swamp Pad]

Ami Onuki: Okay, Buhdeuce, but if you change your mind, we'll be in this box!

Pinkie Pie: Let's play Mountain Climbing Adventure!

Ami Onuki: Let's go for it! [pulls the flaps of the box over on them] Gloves!

Pinkie Pie: Check.

Ami Onuki: Hats!

Pinkie Pie: Check.

Ami Onuki: Underwear!

Pinkie Pie: Uh... check!

Ami Onuki: Okay, Pinkie, climb up there and secure this rope.

Pinkie Pie: You got it! [climbing noises come from the box]

Ami Onuki: Pinkie! Pinkie! Pinkie, you're going too high!

Buhdeuce: I hope they put some air holes in that box. [goes inside the Swamp Pad]

Ami Onuki: Take it easy, Pinkie, you've got to acclimate!

Pinkie Pie: I'll take it easy when I'm dead! I'm shaking my hooves with God! Whoo! Excelsior!

Buhdeuce: [opens his door] Now where's that remote?

''[Buhdeuce walks up to the remote, which is right next to the box. He picks it up, puts it in his shirt and stands next to the box, listening to Ami and Pinkie Pie]''

Pinkie Pie: I am the lizard queen! Whoo!

Ami Onuki: Pinkie? Pinkie? Pinkie! I think we should keep our voices down! We might start an avalanche!

Pinkie Pie: What?

Ami Onuki: I said, I think we should keep our voices down in case of avalanches!

Pinkie Pie: What should we keep down?

Buhdeuce: Weirdos.

Ami Onuki: OUR VOICEEEEEESS!!!!!!!!!!

Buhdeuce: WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?!?!?!?!?! ''[kicks the box, causing the sound of an avalanche, making Ami and Pinkie Pie scream and fall, they both start to cry. Buhdeuce is shocked]'' ...Girls? [he softly touches the box, causing another avalanche]

Pinkie Pie: Hold me.

Ami Onuki: Hang in there buddy, the chopper's on the way!

Pinkie Pie: Ami! My legs are frozen solid! You're going to have to cut them off with a saw! [Buhdeuce begins to sweat]

Ami Onuki: No, Pinkie, I can't do that!

Pinkie Pie: Why not?

Ami Onuki: Because I already cut off my own arms! [Buhdeuce kneels down]

Pinkie Pie: Nooooo!

''[Buhdeuce quickly opens the box and looks in. Ami and Pinkie Pie sit inside the box]''

Buhdeuce: [confused] What the? How were you two making that noise?

Ami Onuki: [laughs] What noise, Buhdeuce?

Pinkie Pie: I could only hear the sound of our laughter.

Buhdeuce: Yes! But those sound effects: the avalanche, the, the, the...

Pinkie Pie: Don't forget the second avalanche.

Buhdeuce: You know what? Forget it. [closes the box] I don't know why I'm wasting my time out here when I could be watching my brand new television. [helicopter sounds are heard from the box, Buhdeuce looks around at the sky and ducks]

Pilot Inside Box: Attention climbers, please hold on! The saws are on the way!

Ami Onuki and Pinkie Pie: Yay!

Buhdeuce: Grrrr... AHA!!! [he opens the box again and sees Ami and Pinkie Pie sitting inside the box again] How are you two doing that?

Ami Onuki: First we establish a base camp at 15,000 feet...

Buhdeuce: The noises! How are you two making those noises?

Pinkie Pie: Oh, That's easy. All you need is a box.

Ami Onuki: And... [makes another rainbow with her hands] ...imagination.

Buhdeuce: [as Ami and Pinkie Pie duck down into the box] Are you two trying to say that I have no imagination?! I have more imagination... [tries to make a rainbow with his hands, like Ami, but is unsuccessful] ...in one hand than you two have in your whole bodies.

Pinkie Pie: That's good. Now all you need is a box. [closes the box]

Buhdeuce: [walks back to the Swamp Pad] I'll show them!

[Buhdeuce looks in his closet]

Buhdeuce: There's gotta be a box in here somewhere!

[Buhdeuce finds a small, round green box]

Buhdeuce: Ah! This hat box should do nicely. [pulls out a Mexican sombrero] Why haven't I worn this yet?

[Buhdeuce throws it off-screen, gets in the box but Buhdeuce is too big for it and then just sits there]

Buhdeuce: This is kinda tight.

''[Buhdeuce then frowns, looks at his watch and then gets mad and kicks the box. Police sirens are heard]''

Policeman Inside Ami Onuki and Pinkie Pie's box: Attention! We have you surrounded! Come out with your hands up!

Buhdeuce: What do they want with me? What did I do? [he gasps] Obviously I violated some new boxing law!

[Buhdeuce walks out of the Swamp Pad showing the green box]

Buhdeuce: Look officers, everything's okay. I won't do it again!

Criminal Inside Box: You'll never take me alive, coppers!

Man Inside Box: No, Johnny! Don't do it!

''[Police sirens are heard. Buhdeuce gets angry and kicks the green box toward Ami and Pinkie Pie's box]''

Pinkie Pie: [opens box and sirens stop] Whoopee! Another box!

[Pinkie Pie takes the hat box and closes the box they're sitting in and police sirens are heard again]

Buhdeuce: I got to try to relax. Perhaps I can drown out their childish games with a little TV.

[Buhdeuce turns on the TV to see a show with boxes on a conveyor belt in a factory]

Male TV narrator: It is here that the boxes reach their final stage of assembly.

[Buhdeuce changes the channel to an old professor talking about a box equation on a chalkboard]

Professor: The equation is demonstrated here by this box.

[Buhdeuce changes the channel to a soap opera with a man and woman]

Man: I couldn't afford a present this year, so I got you this box. [he holds up a box]

Woman: That's what I got you! [she also holds up a box]

Buhdeuce: Isn't there anything on that isn't about BOXES?!?! [changes channel to a boxing match on TV]

Announcer: And welcome back to Championship Boxing.

Buhdeuce: [chuckles in hope] Heh-heh, I guess this is okay. I mean, it's not really about boxes.

[the two boxes go at each other in the ring]

Buhdeuce: Aww, Bubble Nuggets.

Astronaut inside Ami Onuki and Pinkie Pie's box: 3... 2... 1... blast off! [a loud rocket takes off noises are heard from the box]

Buhdeuce: [fascinated] How are they doing that? That was the most realistic space launch I ever heard! There must be an explanation. Think, Buhdeuce, think!

[Buhdeuce imagines Ami and Pinkie Pie are giggling so much]

Ami Onuki: Shh! [Ami grabs a tape recorder to play music with real rocket sound effects] Buhdeuce is such a jerk. [both laugh]

Buhdeuce: Laugh at me, will they?

[Buhdeuce goes out and opens box once again]

Buhdeuce: All right, where is it?

Pinkie Pie: [comes out of Buhdeuce's green hat box] Here I am!

Ami Onuki: Where's what, Buhdeuce?

Buhdeuce: Don't "Where's what, Buhdeuce?" me! Where's the tape recorder?

Ami Onuki: We don't have a tape recorder, Buhdeuce!

Buhdeuce: Don't "We don't have a tape recorder, Buhdeuce!" me!

Ami Onuki: But we don't!

Pinkie Pie: [holds up a small, white, rectangular box in her hoof] We have a tape recorder box.

Buhdeuce: [takes the small, white box from Pinkie Pie and throws it offscreen] All right, make way you two, I'm coming in. [gets into box]

Ami Onuki: Welcome aboard, Buhdeuce! You've just set sail on the S.S... [makes a rainbow with her hands once more] ...Imagination... where our only destination is fantastic adventure! Where do you want to go first?

Buhdeuce: No, no. Don't mind me, I'm just here to observe.

Ami Onuki: Buhdeuce, don't you see? Waiting and watching? That's not what the box is about! It's about... [makes one last rainbow with her hands] ...imagination.

Buhdeuce: ALRIGHT, FINE!!! [as Buhdeuce makes the rainbow go away with his hands] Take me to Robot Pirate Island! I wanna arm-wrestle with cowboys on the moon! Just do it so I can get back and watch TV!

Ami Onuki: Okay, Buhdeuce! Robot Pirate Island it is!

[Ami and Pinkie Pie close their eyes and make pirate and robot sounds]

Pinkie Pie: [imitates robot] Beep-beep-beep.

Ami Onuki: [imitates pirate] Arr.

Pinkie Pie: Beep-boop-bee-boop.

Ami Onuki: Ahoy matey!

Pinkie Pie: Beep-beep.

Ami Onuki: For that you'll walk the plank!

[Ami giggles softly, and Pinkie Pie starts chuckling goofily]

Buhdeuce: ''[he gets angry. he growls]'' WHY WON'T THIS THING TURN ON?!?!?!?! [Buhdeuce slams the bottom of the box with his fists] All right, fine. If you don't want to show me, [gets out of the box] I don't care! I've got better things to do than pace the floor wondering how you two work this thing.

[Buhdeuce paces back and forth in the Swamp Pad]

Buhdeuce: How do those two work that thing?! There's got to be a secret button or a switch or something! I mean, listen to that!

[Buhdeuce hears real robot/pirate battle noises from box]

Buhdeuce: Now, that sounds like Robot Pirate Island! Think, Buhdeuce, think! I got it: when those two go to bed, I'll sneak in there and find that button! I'll wait all night if I have to!

[Buhdeuce sits in his chair until nighttime]

''[firework and cheering sounds are heard coming from the box. Ami and Pinkie Pie come out of the box and Pinkie Pie yawns]''

Pinkie Pie: I need sleep to refuel my imagination tanks!

Ami Onuki: [Buhdeuce looks out of the window] I still can't believe those pirates beat all those robots.

Pinkie Pie: Yeah, see you in the morning.

Ami Onuki: Good night, Pinkie. [they both go into their houses]

''[Buhdeuce sneaks out of the Swamp Pad. he tiptoes over to the box and gets inside]''

Buhdeuce: [He chuckles mischievously and then sees a piece of paper on the side of the box] Hello, what's this?

Buhdeuce: [reads the paper] "This plaque is to commemorate the brave pirates who gave their lives to keep this box safe from the Robot Menace. Lest we forget... Ohh!

[Buhdeuce tears the paper into pieces with anger]

Buhdeuce: I've got to find that button quick!

Buhdeuce: [looks around the box] It's got to be around here somewhere.

Buhdeuce: I don't see anything!

Buhdeuce: It's just an empty box!

Buhdeuce: Maybe it really was their imagination.

Buhdeuce: Oh... get it together, Buhdeuce! What are you saying?

Buhdeuce: I mean, do I really believe that if I sit here and pretend to drive a race car that I'm suddenly going to start hearing noises?

Buhdeuce: [pushes his duck foot down and the sound of an engine revving is heard] What the...?

Buhdeuce: [he turns the imaginary key] It actually works! I can't believe it! Ha-ha! Oh my bap! This beats TV by a long shot! [laughs] Whooo-hoo-hoo! This is the most fun I've ever had!

[the noises actually come from a garbage truck, which lifts the box into the other garbage]

Ami Onuki: [Buhdeuce is cheering in the distance while Ami is reading a book in bed with her bed posts lit like candles] Listen to that, Tekirai. Buhdeuce finally made the box work after all. That's so great.

Buhdeuce: [the garbage truck begins to drive away with the box that Buhdeuce is in] Vroom! Vroom! Only two more laps to the finish line!

[the garbage truck dumps out the trash, including the box]

Buhdeuce: I'm in the lead! Out of my way! I'm almost there! [laughs as the box slides down a trash pile] Whoo-hoo-hoo! Victory is mine!

''[the box hits something, sending Buhdeuce tumbling down, face first onto a cherry pie. He groans and the box falls on Buhdeuce]''

[The next morning, Ami and Pinkie Pie come out of their houses]

Ami Onuki: Hey, our box is gone!

Pinkie Pie: Oh, well.

Ami Onuki: I know! Let's go see Buhdeuce!

Pinkie Pie: I hope he's not too down in the dumps today.

[She and Ami walk to the Swamp Pad]

[a timpani noise is heard in the background as the screen fades to black]

THE END.